See ya '09

That last day of another year. It always catches me by surprise, this passing of time. I keep trying to stop it - or at least see it go by. But like breath, it's imperceptible. Until it's gone.

So teach us to number our days, that we may apply our hearts unto wisdom.

That's what Moses prayed. And of late, it's my prayer too. I don't want to find myself sad that more time has passed. After all, isn't such sorrow simply because I didn't make the most of each moment? Not in a "be all that you can be" or carpe diem sloganeering way, but in a faithful stewardship, fruitful for the kingdom sort of way.

And so again, tomorrow I will spend some time thinking through my priorities and set goals for the new year. A clean slate. A fresh start. As much as I'm wistful over this year's ending, I'm excited about the new year's coming!

Just as this last day gives me pause, and even a pang of sorrow for opportunities lost - moments that will never be again - so tomorrow's first day fills me with joy and wonder. So much possibility. What will the next season hold?

I'm ever thankful for a God - our loving heavenly Father - who gave us time. When we use it for His glory, it's a gift.

And so, with Moses, I pray,

O satisfy us early with thy mercy; that we may rejoice and be glad all our days. Make us glad according to the days wherein thou hast afflicted us, and the years wherein we have seen evil. Let thy work appear unto thy servants, and they glory unto their children. And let the beauty of the Lord our God be upon us: and establish thou the work of our hands upon us; yea, the work of our hands establish thou it.

Lord, help me. Guide me into your will and help me to be a good steward of the days, hours and minutes ahead. Amen.

Another Christmas

Am I too young to be feeling nostalgic around Christmas time? Sometimes I can feel as though I am so incredibly old, although not at all wise... which is one of the only upsides to aging that I can see.

I spent Christmas and Boxing day in Vancouver, visiting family. We started at my Oma and Opa's house (dad's parents), migrated to my aunt and uncle's (dad's sister), and then made the long drive to my Omi's apartment(mom's mom).

In each place I was repeatedly reminded of the increasing age of those I have always known and loved. With no cousins, my brother and I are the youngest in our immediate family, with the next youngest already in their 40's.

I was looking around the table and thinking, "What are we going to do once their gone?" Christmas for me has always been about sharing food and laughter with these people... but as their mortality becomes more and more clear (aches and pains), I'm forced to realize that we won't be together forever.

There was one point during Christmas dinner that we went around the table and shared a memory of Christmas from when we were younger. I thoroughly enjoyed hearing the stories of those in their 80's who grew up in Germany, Austria, and the Ukraine; Christmas was so different for them... more like it should be. And when my turn came around I realized that when I am their age, looking back at my childhood, it will be these people and their stories that I'll be talking about with an ache in my heart. This loud, eccentric crowd of Germans, always shouting over each other, always speaking half the time in a language I don't understand. It will be dinners like the very one I was eating that I will remember with longing, and traditions like the one's we kept that I will make sound so delightful.

And so I realized that someday, these Christmases that are so beautiful and full of warmth, love, and belonging will be just a memory, foggy remembrances that I will try to cling to and recall as much of as possible. Of course, they will be replaced with traditions that are just as beloved and people who are equally as cherished, and life will go on. Just as it always does.

Maybe one day I'll sit at the head of the table as the matron of a family and talk about what Christmas was like when I was a girl. Some teenager down at the other end of the table will be playing with her fork in an attempt to stay awake, and I'll smile one of those secret smiles that old people seem to favor, knowing.

Strange little life we live, isn't it? So short, so perfect.

Vacation at last

I'm home at last from our vacation up island to Mt. Washington. It was a lovely time and exactly what I needed after so many weeks of never-ending and difficult work. I wouldn't say that it was completely relaxing, because every day was jam packed with activities... but I think that the word 'refreshing' fits quite perfectly. I got to play for hours with my beloved new camera lens, explore wintery wonderlands, dig snow tunnels, and read john keats by a warm fire.

My favorite moment? Yesterday night. Earlier in the day my dad and I had sat at the Nordic Centre and dreamt up the idea of a wonderous snack... and so later the boys made a midnight trek outside and returned with a bucket of snow. We each helped ourselves to a bowl of it, and then dosed the stuff with the purest of maple syrups. It was SOOO very Canadian! We sat, ate maple syrup snow, and said things like, "This is great, eh?" and, "What are you talking a-boot?". I've never felt so patriotic. haha.

Ah. So happy.

Those crazy Brazilians

Check out this news article from the BBC: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/8416667.stm

Poem Sunday - Dec 13th 09

I've decided that I will make a real effort to make all Sundays 'Poem Sunday'. For me, poetry and art allow a way of expressing what I am otherwise unable to. And when even that won't do, I can usually turn to the art and poetry of those more experienced and famous than me. So, as I read through poetry in my spare time, I'll make note of the ones I most identify with/move me the most, and share them here. Usually they relate to what's going on in my life at the current time... much like the Bible passages that move me most at a particular time are the ones that most relate to my current situation. Other times, I just think they're pretty. Does that make sense? Hope you enjoy it, it's a taste of what's inside me in a way... I guess. S

Devotion - Robert Frost

"The hear can think of no devotion

Greater than being shore to the ocean--

Holding the curve of one position,

Counting an endless repetition."

I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings - Maya Angelou

"A free bird leaps in the back

Of the wind and floats downstream

Till the current ends and dips his wing

In the orange suns rays

And dares to claim the sky.

But a BIRD that stalks down his narrow cage

Can seldom see through his bars of rage

His wings are clipped and his feet are tied

So he opens his throat to sing.

The caged bird sings with a fearful trill

Of things unknown but longed for still

And his tune is heard on the distant hill for

The caged bird sings for freedom.

The free bird thinks on another breeze

And the trade winds soft through

The sighing trees

And the fat worms waiting on a dawn-bright

Lawn and he names the sky his own

But a caged BIRD stands on the grave of dreams

His shadow shouts on a nightmare scream

His wings are clipped and his feet are tied

So he opens his throat to sing.

The caged bird sings with

A fearful trill of things unknown

But longed for still and his

Tune is heard on the distant hill

For the caged bird sings for freedom."

Meat without Animals... would you eat it?

Check out this article, it's totally given me the freaks:

http://articles.mercola.com/sites/articles/archive/2009/12/12/Growing-Meat-Without-Animals--Would-You-Eat-It.aspx

Parenting: It comes naturally

Christmas Album a Requirement?

It started over a month ago: Christmas songs on the radio. But at least then they were mixed in with a variety of other, less seasonal, options. Now, the holiday favorites are all I encounter when I switch on the radio and browse through the stations. It's unavoidable. And this bombardment with songs made me start to wonder something this morning.

What if when someone is becoming a musical artist of some note, they are called into a meeting where they are told that in order to be permitted to continue on in this line of work, they must commit to producing a Christmas album at some point in their career? It certainly could be the case, couldn't it? I jest of course, but it seems like every successful artist has come out with their version of the same old Christmas carols and hymns.

I like Christmas music as much as the next person, both the secular and the Christian variety. I will always enjoy hearing Bing Crosby's "White Christmas," and Handel's Messiah never fails to send chills down my spine. My favorite of them all, "Oh Holy Night," is sung beautifully by so many artists (Celine Dion, Josh Groban, Charlotte Church, Il Divo).

Many popular acts have been putting out their own take on Christmas songs for at leeeast the past 50 years. Elvis did it. So did John Lennon. I love Nat King Cole's version of "The Christmas Song". Bizarrely, Bing Crosby and David Bowie did a duet that proves that some people's voices are just made to be together (seen here, but be patient through the corny fake dialogue, the good part starts at about 1:50 in).

But it now seems that everyone has to produce a Christmas album! It's one thing to write a new song unique to you, as Elvis and John Lennon did. Jethro Tull's "A Christmas Song" is but an extension of their usual fare.

But I just find it awful (forgive me) when someone whose musical style doesn't lend itself to Christmas music still tries to adapt some holiday songs. I mean... Bob Dylan!? I half expected the lead song to be "Buh Naah Guh Bo Duhh Buh Wuh Dah" (Translation: "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus"... anyone whose heard that guy sing knows what I'm talking about). I generally like Dylan too, but this is one album I think I'll skip. And Reo Speedwagon!? Goodness, those guys were SO 35 years ago! Why plague us with a gimmicky album? Try coming up with something new for a change. haha.

If a musician wants to come up with a new album, I'm willing to listen. But I find myself turned off by the apparently naked opportunism of Christmas albums. No thanks.

Do I sound like a Scrooge?

The pinecone girl

To get to my bus stop from school, I walk down this really steep hill from the back of campus. Today while I was making this exact journey, there was a girl huffing and puffing her way up in the opposite direction. She was carrying this giant pinecone that a unique shape... kind of circular. When we got close enough, she flashed me a huge toothy smile and held up the pinecone proudly. Then we kept walking.

It was just one of those beautiful moments in life.

Experiments with monochrome

A little taste of my latest forays into photography...

A realization of winter

Walking to my class this morning, I crunched my way through grass made brittle from frost, and watched two flocks of geese flap by overhead on their way to warmer climates. A little girl toddled past me so bundled up in coats and mitts and scarves, she looked wider than she was tall.

It's officially winter, my friends.