Be Still, My Soul

We sang the hymn, Be Still, My Soul, this evening in church and I was once again reminded of how much I love it. I'll share it here with you:

"Be still, my soul; the Lord is on thy side;
Bear patiently the cross of grief and pain;
Leave to thy God to order and provide;
In every change He faithful will remain.
Be still, my soul; thy best, thy heavenly, Friend
Through thorny ways leads to a joyful end.

Be still, my soul; thy God doth undertake
To guide the future as He has the past.
Thy hope, thy confidence, let nothing shake;
All now mysterious shall be bright at last.
Be still, my soul; the waves and winds will know
His voice who ruled them while He dwelt below.

Be still, my soul, though dearest friends depart
And all is darkened in the vale of tears;
Then shalt thou better know His love, His heart,
Who comes to soothe thy sorrows and thy fears.
Be still my soul, thy Jesus can repay
From His own fulness all He takes away.

Be still, my soul; the hour is hastening on
When we shall be forever with the Lord,
When disappointment, grief, and fear are gone,
Sorrow forgot, love's purest joys restored.
Be still, my soul; when chance and tears are past,
All safe and blessed we shall meet at last."

Be Still, My Soul, was written by Katharine von Schlegel (1697- c.1768) and translated into English by Jane L. Borthwick (1813-1897). The music was composed by Jean Sibelius, from his music 'Finlandia'. The scripture reference for this hymn is found in Psalm 46:10: "Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!" (NKJV).

To give you a better taste of this hymn's beautiful tune, here's a YouTube clip of it being sung by Libera (Children's choir):

"The church is something beautiful" by Francis Shaeffer

“One cannot explain the explosive power of the early church apart from the fact that they practiced two things simultaneously: the orthodoxy of doctrine and orthodoxy of community in the midst of the visible church, a community which the world could see.

By the grace of God, therefore, the church must be known simultaneously for its purity of doctrine and the reality of its community. Our churches have so often been only preaching points with very little emphasis on community. But the exhibition of the love of God in practice is beautiful and must be there.

We have, then, two sets of parallel couplets: (1) the principle of the purity of the visible church, and yet the practice of observable love among all true Christians; and (2) the practice of orthodoxy of doctrine and observable orthodoxy of community in the visible church.

The heart of these sets of principles is to show forth the love of God and the holiness of God simultaneously. If we show either of these without the other, we exhibit not the character, but a caricature of God for the world to see.

If we stress the love of God without the holiness of God, it turns out only to be compromise. But if we stress the holiness of God without the love of God, we practice something that is hard and lacks beauty. And it is important to show forth beauty before a lost world and a lost generation.

All too often people have not been wrong in saying that the church is ugly. In the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, we are called upon to show a watching world and to our own young people that the church is something beautiful.

Several years ago I wrestled with the question of what was wrong with much of the church that stood for purity. I came to the conclusion that in the flesh we can stress purity without love or we can stress the love of God without purity, but that in the flesh we cannot stress both simultaneously.

In order to exhibit both simultaneously, we must look moment by moment to the work of Christ, to the work of the Holy Spirit. Spirituality begins to have real meaning in our moment-by-moment lives as we begin to exhibit simultaneously the holiness of God and the love of God.”

- Francis Schaeffer, "The Church Before the Watching World" in The Church at the End of the Twentieth Century in The Complete Works of Francis A. Schaeffer: A Christian Worldview, Volume Four, A Christian View of the Church (Wheaton, IL: Crossway, 1982), 152.

Easter Meditation

Charles Spurgeon wrote two centuries ago about the man who was forced by Roman soldiers to help a weak and bleeding Jesus to carry the cross (Mark 15:20-22). He was only enduring a momentary burden. Simon's experience is like the rest of us - thanks to Jesus, our burdens truly are only light and momentary afflictions. Have a blessed Easter weekend.

When Simon was forced to carry the cross for Christ, all he did was haul some wood. Christ carried infinitely more.

[Simon] carried only the wood of [the cross], he did not bear the sin that made it such a load. Christ did but transfer to Simon the outward frame, the mere tree. But the curse of the tree, which was our sin and its punishment, rested on Jesus’ shoulders still. Dear friend, if you think that you suffer all that a Christian can suffer, if all God’s billows roll over you, yet remember, there is not one drop of wrath in all your sea of sorrow. Jesus took the wrath. Jesus carried the sin.” — Charles Spurgeon

Without the gospel everything is useless and vain

"Without the gospel everything is useless and vain; without the gospel we are not Christians; without the gospel all riches is poverty, all wisdom folly before God; strength is weakness, and all the justice of man is under the condemnation of God.

But by the knowledge of the gospel we are made children of God, brothers of Jesus Christ, fellow townsmen with the saints, citizens of the Kingdom of Heaven, heirs of God with Jesus Christ, by whom the poor are made rich, the weak strong, the fools wise, the sinner justified, the desolate comforted, the doubting sure, and slaves free. It is the power of God for the salvation of all those who believe."

- John Calvin, preface for Pierre Robert Olivetan's 1534 French translation of the New Testament.

It's so hard... but may we each remember what is truly important, and turn from fleshly desires. May we each grow in sanctification, away from what is useless and vain, away from relying on our own plans and wants and pitifully limited knowledge of what is true and good. May we desire, above anything else, to glorify the Lord in the way we live our lives.

The new layout (again)

To my annoyance, last week the background on my site stopped working. When creating a background, I edit the HTML for sizing, spacing, etc (formatting junk) and then create an image in another program which I then upload to the net and link to in the HTML. Well, my link became invalid and try though I might, I couldn't get the darn thing to work for me. I'm no expert in this field.

Thus began the long and grueling job of creating another template to use. To decide, I thought of the verses in the Bible that have had an impact on my life. There are quite a few. But I've found that a constant source of strength and comfort to me has been the promise of the Lord's presence and faithfulness throughout life's up and downs, even when I mess up.... badly. With this in mind, I chose the verses from which to build a theme for this blog.

I was baptized when I was sixteen. I asked my youth pastor to do the deed, and I still cherish that role he played in my life. I remember standing nervously back stage with him, hearing the church announcements echoing back to us through the hallway to the baptismal tank. I hung up the towel I had been nervously clutching, and Ryan said, "Ready?"

"Ready."

I remember that the water in the tank was warm, warm enough that I didn't want to get out. I gingerly made my way down the tank stairs, the water lapping at my feet, then my knees, then my belly button. We wadded together from where we seemed so alone, around the corner to where a hundred eyes zeroed in on me. I was so nervous.

Ryan said his bit, I don't remember any of it (I was just focused on trying to control my shaking enough so that at very least the people in the back row wouldn't see it), but I'm sure it was very good. Eventually he nudged me, and I knew it was my turn. I took one step towards the microphone. I read the sign hanging just below it - "DO NOT TOUCH. YOU COULD BE ELECTROCUTED", and felt like giggling. I forgot what I was supposed to say or do... and then I looked down and saw a damp, smudged piece of paper in my hand. So I read from it.

"Hast thou not known? Hast thou not heard, that the everlasting God, the LORD, the Creator of the ends of the earth, fainteth not, neither is weary? There is no searching His understanding.

He giveth power to the faint; and to them that have no might he increaseth strength. Even the youths shall faint and be weary, and the young men shall utterly fall: But they that wait on the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint." - Isaiah 40:28-31

And then Ryan dunked me, and everything went completely silent. For a moment. And then I came up and the congregation erupted in applause. That was that. Seems like it was a long time ago.

At the time when I picked those verses from Isaiah to read, I had just come across them in my devotions and they were completely new to me. I felt as though I had discovered treasure, verses that applied specifically to me and spoke directly into my life. Now, almost 5 years later, I've realized that they are some of the most popular and referenced bible verses. For good reason, I suppose.

I've come back to Isaiah 40 again and again throughout the last few years. The metaphoric, poetic way it is written appeals to me. To mount up on wings like an eagle.... to run and never get tired.... that's powerful stuff, folks. It paints a beautiful picture in my mind. I've often needed strengthening, I've often needed to be reminded of God's ability to lift me up and lift me out.

Mostly, I've done my share of falling. Sometimes it's been more of a trip - I'll stumble, swing my arms wildly to regain balance, and manage (barely) to stay upright. Other times I've just tumbled face first to the ground. Violently, ungracefully, obviously. Recently I've recovered from the biggest fall of my life, it was a fall so terrible that it's left deep scars. But each time the Lord has been faithful and just to forgive me of those sins, those times when I have fallen away. And not only forgive, but uplift me - give me strength and courage to go on. It's humbling, I'm so filled with awe when I think about it. I'm so grateful. So, so grateful.

And so, because these verses have a constant influence and impact on my life, I've chosen to base my theme on them. I am fallen, falling is what I do best. But I wage war daily against my flesh, beating it into submission, and victory is becoming more and more common. I'm reminded of Paul's famous and oft quoted words in Romans 7:

"For we know that the law is spiritual, but I am carnal, sold under sin. For what I am doing, I do not understand. For what I will to do, that I do not practice; but what I hate, that I do. If, then, I do what I will not to do, I agree with the law that it is good. But now, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells in me. For i know that in me (that is, in my flesh) nothing good dwells; for to will is present with me, but how to perform what is good I do not find. For the good that I will to do, I do not do; but the evil I will not to do, that I practice. Now if I do what I will to do, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells in me.

I find then a law, that evil is present in me, the one who wills to do good. For I delight in the law of God according to the inward man. But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members. O wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? I thank God - through Jesus Christ our Lord!"

Who doesn't relate to that?! Every time I read it, my heart is pierced.

There you have it. This is the new layout. And that is why the layout is how it is. Hope you like it!

The Beautiful 'But'

The word 'but' is generally the worst kind of word. It has a very negative connotation, doesn't it? When we hear it, we know something bad is coming:

"You've been an excellent employee, but..."

"It was a great vacation, but..."

"He has nice eyes, but..."

You get the point, I'm sure. Well, as I've read and prayed my way through Romans in the last week, I've discovered an ever-growing appreciation for this word. The best example I can think of is Romans 3: 19-26. Take your time and think about what the word 'but' really means for us:

¹⁹ Now we know that whatever the law says, it says to those who are under the law, that every mouth may be stopped, and all the world may become guilty before God. ²⁰ Therefore by the deeds of the law no flesh will be justified in His sight, for by the law is the knowledge of sin.²¹ But now the righteousness of God apart from the law is revealed, being witnessed by the Law and the Prophets, ²²even the righteousness of God, through faith in Jesus Christ, to all and on all who believe. For there is no difference; ²³ for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, ²⁴ being justified freely by His grace through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus, ²⁵ whom God set forth as a propitiation by His blood, through faith, to demonstrate His righteousness, because in His forbearance God had passed over the sins that were previously committed, ²⁶ to demonstrate at the present time His righteousness, that He might be just and the justifier of the one who has faith in Jesus.

Why is it ok for God to kill?

This week's "Ask Pastor John" piece from Desiring God is brilliant. This is often a question raised by atheists in their arguments against Christianity, and I think John Piper answers the reader question beautifully.

Excerpt from "The Fallen Saint Restored" by Edward Reynolds

The following are quotations from The Fallen Saint Restored, a Cure for Backsliding & Comfort for the Backslider, by Edward Reynolds. I read it a couple months ago and it was extremely helpful (I'm prone to doubt, relying on my own strength, and sin... fallen man that I am). These are just what I liked most from the first few pages! This is a devotional study of Matthew 14:66-72 and Matthew 26:69-75. The author uses the example of Peter's backsliding as an example.

"Self-dependance & pride, or any other carnal affection which is deeply rooted in the nature of men, are often found in the most holy actions of men. It was faith that made Peter go down into the water, but it was flesh that made him sink (Matthew 14:30). Faith made him zealous in Christ's cause, but flesh drew his sword at Malchus' ear. Faith made him follow Christ, but flesh made him follow afar off. Faith made him accompany Christ to the garden, but flesh made him sleep. Faith made him promise perseverance, but flesh made him peremptory in that promise. In a word: faith made him resolute to confess, but flesh to contradict his master.

God must give us perseverance before we promise it; it is not in our power, thought it is our duty, to perform it. Though Peter may, by virtue of Christ's promise, be sure not to fall into hell, he cannot be sure by that same promise not to fall into temptation. Though he can be sure that faith will have the last victory, he cannot be sure that faith will have every victory. Though faith cannot die and be finally dried up, yet it may ebb and languish. Though even now in the mind of Peter, faith can look undaunted on the nails of the cross, yet presently it may be affrighted at the voice of a maid. He who has given faith to us, is the only one who can give life & action to our faith. Christ is both the quickener & the object of our faith; by His power it works & on His merits it relies. When He is pleased to withdraw Himself, when both object & mover of faith is absent, faith will be inoperative.

As we cannot see the sun without the light of the sun, so neither can we believe in Christ without the grace of Christ. Lord! Let me never barely promise, but let me pray, & let my purpose to die for Christ be seconded with the supplication that I may not deny Him. Whenever I have an arm of confidence to lift in defense of the truth, let me have a knee of humility to bow before the throne of Grace. Lord, give me what I may promise, & I will promise what you require."

Truths I had never considered before in that way. Beautiful. Convicting.

When Sovereignty Hurts

"Jesus to Thee I lift my eyes

To Thee I breathe my soul's desires.

Are you not mine, my living Lord?

And can my hope, my comfort die?

Fixed on the everlasting Word

That Word which built the earth and sky..."

-"Jesus, I Lift My Eyes

There's something scary about sovereignty. The fact that God has complete and total power over all circumstances - that He can and does preordain situations - is difficult theology to accept.

Why? It's hard to wrap our minds around a God who has the power to stop all pain and suffering, and yet allows it to continue. He ordains cancer. He predestines hospital stays. Stillborn children are not people who slipped through the cracks of God's plans. There are no car accidents. God sovereignly appoints all circumstances.

This is not a fact that is easy to say or swallow, but it's the only option that can be true. If we don't believe that God allows suffering, then we must believe He doesn't have control over it. If we believe God is obligated as a God of love to stop all suffering, and he He doesn't, then we must assume He can't. Because whether or not we think it should, suffering does exist.

But my goal today is not to write persuasively on God's sovereignty. Maybe another day. The thought that has been pressed into my mind for the past week or so is God's trustworthiness. My mind has traveled like this:

Is God in control? Yes.

Can He stop the pain? Yes.

But what if He doesn't? Is God still worthy of my trust?

If I trusted a friend to catch me, but instead they let me fall flat on my face, my confidence in them would quickly evaporate. Even if they explained that they let me fall to help me grow as a person, I'd probably be ticked. What are friends for, anyway?

In a way, this is exactly what God does. He demands that you trust Him. He tells you to obey. Inevitably, suffering then arrives in some form. Your heart betrays you. Your wallet is stolen. You watch your best friend fight for his life. You then must continue loving and worshipping Him, knowing all the while that He didn't prevent your pain.

On the surface, that's what life is like. We know that we can do nothing to divert or foretell God's plans. We just strap ourselves in for a tumultuous ride, secretly wondering whether God ever loved us at all. We ask whether He's forgotten us.

But it's here we find something unexpected in the suffering equation - something to sing about.

Him. He doesn't forget us.

We forget Him. We don't forget that He could have prevented all our pain if He wanted to - we dwell on that quite a lot. But we forget Jesus as Himself. We dwell on the blessings that He withholds, not the supreme blessing He constantly offers - Himself.

God's sovereignty does not eclipse His loving nature, His faithfulness or mercy. Just because He ordains pain doesn't mean He ignores our prayers or wants us to suffer alone. After all, it is the same God who once ordained His own Son's death for our sakes. Giving everything to pay for us, do you think He'd quickly let us go?

Religion Oppresses Women

At least that's what Nicholas Kristof writes in a recent New York Times article. Specifically, he asks: "[W]hy do so many faiths help perpetuate something that most of us regard as profoundly unethical: the oppression of women?"

Kristof acknowledges that no religion advocates mass rapes in Congo, bride burnings in India or men throwing acid in the face of schoolgirls in Afghanistan. But, he warns,

...these kinds of abuses - along with more banal injustices, like slapping a girlfriend or paying women less for their work - arise out of a social context in which women are, often, second class citizens. That's a context that religions have helped shape, and not pushed hard to change.

"Women are prevented from playing a full and equal role in many faiths, creating an environment in which violations against women are justified," former President Jimmy Carter noted in a speech last month to the Parliament of the World's Religions in Australia.

"The belief that women are inferior beings in the eyes of God," Mr. Carter continued, "gives excuses to the brutal husband who beats his wife, the soldier who rapes a woman, the employer who has a lower pay scale for women employees, or parents who decide to abort a female embryo."

Reading an article like Kristof's always presents a bit of a challenge to me -- in part, because we have some real points of agreement.

There are atrocities committed upon women every day. Some religions have promoted it or, at the least, tolerated them. The belief that women are inferior human beings does, I believe, contribute to those atrocities.

But when Kristof concludes that, "Today, when religious institutions exclude women from their hierarchies and rituals, the inevitable implications is that females are inferior," I have to call a "Whoa, Nellie!"

You see, while Kristof is comfortable with throwing all religious belief into the stockpile of "religion," I am not. The questions for me isn't "Does religion encourage the abuse of women?" but rather "Does a particular religion encourage the abuse of women?" And, more specifically, does mine?

I cannot speak knowledgeably about other world religions. I admit that I am baffled by how they treat women. Some would see a woman as so inferior that she may not walk alone or be educated while simultaneously saying that she is such a powerful force that her actions can bring disgrace upon an entire family of males and she must be killed. Truly sickening.

But I have had to question my own belief system, and I have come to understand that accepting leadership structures in the home and church does not give the "inevitable implication" that I am inferior. I am an equally worthy child of God, a fellow heir of grace with my brothers in Christ. Simply because I acknowledge that I was created for different roles than my brothers does not mean that I am a lesser than.

Even Kristof admits what he calls a paradox about Christianity:

[T]he church in Africa that have done the most to empower women have been conservative ones led by evangelicals...

Perhaps, Kristof writes, churches are the problem but can also be the solution. But what Kristof doesn't see is that those evangelical churches are doing the same thing in Africa that theyare called by the Word to do anywhere in the world: teaching men and women to love the Lord their God with all their heart, soul and mind.

When that happens, all women -- young and old, single, married or widowed -- are honored and protected.

Vessel of Honour

I know that I am precious to the Lord and that He is overseeing my life, but sometimes it's hard to believe that He has a plan bigger than that one I can see.

"But in a great house there are not only vessels of gold and silver, but also of wood and clay, some for honor and some for dishonor. Therefor if anyone cleanses himself from the latter, he will be a vessel of honor, sanctified and useful for the Master, prepared for ever good work." - 2 Timothy 2:20-21

Some of my friends have gotten married and are having children. I've enjoyed seeing their wedding pictures and watching their families grow. I devour the Christmas emails and I laugh at the cute online videos.

When I see the happiness of the blissfully married, I sometimes yearn for what they have. And why shouldn't I? Their covenant is an earthly picture of the unity between Christ and the church. I am created to recognize the beauty in that.

Perhaps this is the reason that even though I know I am created in God's image as much as anyone, on some level, I feel like less of a person because I'm single. Why else would I feel like changing the topic when people start asking me I am not yet married? Or feel like I have nothing to contribute to all the mommy talk conversations?

Reconciling the call God has on my life with what He is doing in the lives of other can be difficult. And when feelings of inferiority creep in, especially regarding my spiritual life, it makes matters worse.

This is one reason I believe the church has sought to elevate singleness in recent years. Some have used Paul's word in 1 Corinthians 7:8 to make a case for singleness being desirable and even preferable to marriage - "a gift". Those who promote this view may not actually be trying to say that singleness is superior to marriage, but rather establish that singles are equally valuable to God.

We live in a culture in which marrying well is a challenge. Many Christian singles would love to be married, but though they desire marriage, and are praying and preparing for it, it simply has not happened.

While I believe that God's opinion of me is not wrapped up in my marital status, I sometimes receive these messages from those around me. One that is particularly insidious says that a spiritual deficiency of which I am unaware or a lack of God's favor or direction in my life is keeping me single. In other words: If I were holier, I'd me married by now.

That is why I find those verses from 2 Timothy so encouraging. How wonderful to hear God telling me that He has a plan and purpose behind my singleness - especially in my commitment to purity. In His eyes, my single years are not a waste.

Much of the talk on singleness todays seems to either devalue marriage or over-value it. We live in a culture that is hostile towards marriage. TV alone could convince you matrimony is a losing proposition. But that is not God's view: He established marriage to meet humanity's basic need for companionship and intimacy, and, as such, it is His intention for most people.

At the same time, we know that marriage isn't the answer to our deepest longing for communion. Plenty of married couples would tell you some of their loneliest moments have occurred since they tied the knot. At their deepest level, all humans long for communion with Christ. So how can we adopt a balanced view of God's intention for marriage and singleness?

First we must realize that God's will for people isn't dependent on marital status. But faithful and chaste singleness proclaims God. Marriage is an earthy reflection of the union with Christ and other believers awaiting us in heaven. Celibate singleness declares that ultimate union by forgoing sexual union on earth for a season - or, in special cases, for a lifetime.

Ephesians 5:25-27 says: "Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish."

By loving their spouses devotedly, married men and women demonstrate on a small scale Christ's love for the church. And by keeping themselves pure, singles express the significance of Christ's coming union with His church (a moment fraught with such greatness that the trials of denying the flesh in this life pale in comparison). In both states - singleness and marriage - a believer reflects Christ through a lifestyle of self-giving.

At this time, I do that by serving the people God has placed in my life- friends, the kids at my church, my classmates. In the future, I may fulfill this calling by serving a husband and children. Now I minister as an individual; in the future, I may minister through a family unit. In both states, my life testifies to God's miraculous plan as I pour it out for His use.

Let me offer some encouragement to those who have either remained virgins or committed themselves to a 'second virginity'. "True love waits" can ring a little hollow as time continues to pass and still no Prince Charming carries you into the sunset. Especially in a culture that places extreme value on sexual conquest and experimentation.

While my convictions are deeply set at this point, I won't say that David's words in Psalm 73:3 don't resonate with me: "Surely I have cleansed my heart in vain, And washed my hands in innocence."

Sometimes I feel like my commitment to sexual purity is a waste. That thinking is the result of living in a world that scorns purity and celebrates licentiousness. But the truth is God cherishes purity. And ultimately, I am not the one who has kept my heart pure; through His Spirit, the Lord has preserved it as a testimony to Himself. This is a high calling. Purity in singleness is a special offering to the Lord.

Yes, sexual purity will set you apart. But set apart (which is the meaning of the word holy) is what God calls us to be (1 Peter 1:15-16). I am reminded of the 10 virgins in Matthew 25. Five of them waited with their lamps full of oil. Their preparedness was a testimony to their desire for the coming bridegroom and their faith that he would actually come.

I have been reminded of my high calling. There have been times when I have felt dissatisfied with my current position in life. Sometimes I wonder if God is really ordering my steps.

I think singles must feel more acutely than most that we are "sojourners and pilgrims" in this world (1 Peter 2:11). The thing is, all people long for something more because this earth is not our true home.

And so the gap between single and married is not so wide after all. All of us wait eagerly for our ultimate union with our heavenly Bridegroom. And as we live faithfully - single or married - our very lives proclaim Christ to the world.

The Strange Ways God Arranges to Forgive

The desiring God blog, written by John Piper, has an excellent post today entitled 'The Strange Ways God Arranges to Forgive'. Check it out here.

And because just writing that makes this post seem much too short, I thought we'd have a little John Piper Fest haha. Here are some quotes that I particularly like:

"The longer I live the less optimistic I am that I will end without sin and the more grateful I become for the blood of Christ imputed to me. As I grow older I do not feel myself becoming gloriously holy but I find myself feeling great love for the gospel."

"Faith is looking away from ourselves to another. Faith is total dependance on another. When faith stands in front of a mirror, the mirror becomes a window with the glory of Christ on the other side. Faith looks to Christ and enjoys him as the sum and judge of all that is true and good and right and beautiful and valuable and satisfying."

"God's wisdom exalts what the cross stands for, and human wisdom is offended by what the cross stands for."

"Jesus Christ is not merely the means of our rescue from damnation; he is the goal of our salvation. If he is not satisfying to be with, there is no salvation.

He is not merely the rope that pulls us from the threatening waves; he is the solid beach under our feet, the air in our lungs, and the beat of our heart, and the warm sun on our skin, and the song in our ears, and the arms of our beloved."

Happy Monday everyone

p.s. I haven't forgotten my promise to make Sundays 'poem sundays', however the holidays have messed with my schedule. It will resume this week, so no worries.

My Dresser Drawer

Not long ago I carried an armload of fresh laundry into my room and separated the shirts from the pants; placing them all in their correct drawers. Folded, tidy. The trouble occurred when I tried to close the drawers. I pushed harder on the thick padding of shirts and pants. No movement. It was full - really, really full. I tossed the remaining pieces of clothing from the neatly folded laundry pile back onto my bed.

Now I must interject, it's not that this dresser drawer is the epitome of disorganization, but rather it was simply so full of clothing that not one more t-shirt was going to fit. And this dresser is not small - it's a decent size dresser. And that's when it hit me.

I suddenly recognized the amazing blessing that was sitting before my eyes - I had completely overlooked it. What I saw at the moment was a brief inconvenience that was causing me trauma. Just think about how many millions would love to have my problem. So many parents who would do anything to give their child the gift of having to struggle to fit all of their clothing in a massive dresser. In that moment, I bent over my dresser and prayed for forgiveness and thanked God for the many blessings I have in my life.

I remembered Jesus' words to those souls who believed that they had the right to enter heaven:

"Depart from Me, you cursed, into the everlasting fire prepared for the devil and his angels: for I was hungry and you have Me no food; I was thirsty and you have Me no drink; I was a stranger and you did not take Me in, naked and you did not clothe Me, sick and in prison and you did not visit Me."

Oh, but "Lord, when did we see You hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and did not minister to You?"

The reply is chilling, "Assuredly, I say to you, inasmuch as you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to Me."

I need to stop complaining and worrying about what I possess and how I dress. God hit me hard on my issue of pride once again. I was proud of what I look like or what I wore and what I possessed. My humility was false because I was taking pride in my humility! I realized that I need to stop worrying about money for college. God will provide. If the birds and flowers were are taken care of, I'll be fine. As the Caedmon's Call song says, "You know the plans you have for me / and You can't plan the ends and not plan the means." I rest assured in the sovereignty of God.

Moreover, I realized that I must see the needs of others, both physically and spiritually. I understand that life is not about me - it's about God and Him glorified through the salvation of souls and the cross. He cares about humanity, and I must care about humanity as well. I must share not only clothing, but also the gospel. That must be the ultimate goal, yet I must not neglect the act of sharing food, or giving money, of clothing the naked, or nursing the sick. I have been commanded to share these blessings. Does that mean giving away clothing? It certainly points to that.

All my life I have been burdened for the unsaved and suffering in our world. But when they have so little, and I have so much, it feels hypocritical to talk about how much I care for them but I could obviously be doing so much more. Nelson Mandela once said that it is not what you are born with that makes one great, but what you do with it. I quote him not because I desire to be great, but because I think it's right for those of use who were born into privilege to use our wealth to bless and take care of those who were not in the name of Christ, not live as though our brothers and sisters in Africa, Asia, etc did not exist.

Stephen Lewis (the former Canadian ambassador to the UN, current UN Secretary-General's special envoy for HIV/AIDS in Africa, director of the Stephen Lewis foundation, and personal idol of mine) said in his book Race Against Time, "I have to say that the ongoing plight of Africa forces me to perpetual rage. It's all so unnecessary, so crazy that hundreds of millions of people should be thus abandoned."

We read things like that, and like the newly released statistics out of Malawi that for their population of twelve millions, there are only three hundred doctors. That means every doctor should be taking care of 40,000 patients each - an impossible goal (Canada has a ratio of 1/470, much better odds). And what do we feel in reaction to these things? Sadness. A sense of injustice. A motivation to help in some way. Guilt. Anger perhaps. But what comes of those feelings? They last for a moment. And then we go out for dinner with our friends and families and laugh and chat and forget. We let ourselves forget because acting on those emotions would lead to sacrifice, and no one likes sacrifice.

Sure, some of us give donations from time to time. Some of us send canned goods around Christmas time. But that's not enough. How long have the western, so-call Christian, countries known about the suffering in Africa and beyond? So why is it still going on while we by ourselves plasma TVs and new cars for Christmas, then attend church the next evening?

Maybe I'm missing something here. Maybe I'm making a bigger deal out of this than I should. But for me, this all doesn't make sense. It just doesn't. I don't get it. And don't get me wrong, I was right in there with the rest of you this holiday season with the gifts and the ever-growing materialism. I'm equally as guilty. But I want to change. I've been commanded to care for the suffering and I don't think Jesus was talking about scribbling a cheque for a charity once a year, or donating clothes that you yourself wouldn't wear anymore to homeless shelters (not that you should stop!). This is a challenge to put others before yourself. Like, really and truly.

The sad thing is that I know this post won't make a difference. Some people may read it and feel momentarily convicted and challenged. But then they will forget, as we always do. Jesus said that the poor will always be among us, and I can see why that is. But I still think it's worth a shot to TRY and do something... or at least give a little more than I already do.